Our family will be going through a change in 9 months…
Some of you are thinking, Is Jenny pregnant again!!??
I’m not pregnant. And that statement alone freaks me out ’cause I’ve said it before only to find out I was pregnant when I said it…but that’s another blog with a happy ending.
So, instead of welcoming a new little one into our arms, we’ll welcome America! Our family will be packing up our things and moving back to America in June of 2013. And not…returning…to China.
Not easy to explain how that above statement makes me feel. Since we decided to move back about a month ago, I have had a constant flow of different emotions.
I want to tell you how scary America seems to me, but don’t know where to start.
I mean seriously, have you read the headlines lately? I know, you’re probably thinking, seriously Jenny, you live in a Communist country!
But because of my lack of language skills and because it is a Communist country (they don’t allow certain stuff on the news), I’m clueless to all the news reports about killings/murders, kidnaps, child abuse…I’ve been living in a news void for 6 years!
I want to explain how excited I am too, day dreams of mini vans, backyards, and dryers float in my mind. And the very thought of having family nearby makes me smile every time. Okay, not EVERY time, sometimes it’s nice to have an ocean between me and family drama; but other times, I just want that hug, that understanding that only family can give.
I want to express how I feel like I’ve missed out on some things and now I only have 9 months to try again or maybe I didn’t miss out and that’s the lesson I’m still learning.
And how much I will miss China and how I don’t know how to say goodbye to it. Saying goodbye was easier in America ’cause I knew I’d be back in about 2 years, but not so this June; once I leave, I don’t have 2 years to look forward to a visit. When I board that plane, it’s done.
How do I say goodbye when so much of me is here?
With tears in her eyes, Jolie said this upon hearing about our move to America, “I got my wish, but I’m not sure I want it anymore.”
In 9 months our family is going to go through a big change, and yet, it’s already happening…